Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Jay's Top Villains of All-Time

Being that this is my blog I can make my own list and not have to answer to anybody about them, Because its my blog. lol.

Anyways, with the release of Batman - The Dark Knight (A brilliant master piece by the way) and the Amazing performance of Heth Ledger R.I.P. I've decided to come up with my very own list of greatest villains.

I've always been one for the bad guys growing up. Always wanting to see them win for some reason.

Despite my love for Megatron (Transformers) I can't place him in this top ten list of Villains that being he hasn't truly accomplished anything. He's yet to take over the universe or even defeat his arch rival Optimus Prime.

10. Emperor Palpatine (The Star Wars Saga)

Why I Like Him: So evil as to be the incarnation of the word for a generation of movie fans, the name of the Emperor of the Galactic Empire has gone hand and hand with the word villain for going on three decades and still evokes that scheming and ancient darkness whenever his image is brought to mind. Whereas Vader is the star of the Saga, and in many minds the ultimate face of evil, Palpatine is the antagonist that moves the plot along towards his own ends.

The man is a bit of an enigma in that we don't know much about him, other then he was a senator from Naboo, that he eventually used the sympathy that position gave him to become Supreme Chancellor of the Senate, and after having emergency powers issued to him he usurped most of the authority of the government, eventually crowning himself Emperor of the Galaxy.
From his story of Darth Plagueis the Wise it is speculated that when he refers to the apprentice
of Plagueis killing him he is actually speaking of himself. This makes sense, and is generally held as truth by most fans of the series. He himself had two apprentices before Vader, and used both almost as if they were merely tools towards his ends, to be discarded once their use had been fulfilled. The two were Darth Maul and Darth Tyranus, Tyranus being killed at the hands of Anakin at the behest of Palpatine himself.

His plan of take over was well thought out, and was nearly flawless in execution. Palpatine enjoyed the position of Emperor for many years before he was eventually overthrown by the rebellion, and during that time period his reign of terror brought worlds to their knees. His pop culture references are numerous, and he remains an icon of evil to this day.

"There is no civility, only politics." - Senator Palpatine

"I will make it legal." - Darth Sidious

"Wipe them out. All of them." - Darth Sidious

"Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen ..." - Emperor Palpatine

"Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the Dark Side!" - Emperor Palpatine

"Oh no, my young Jedi. You will find that it is you who are mistaken about a great many things." - Emperor Palpatine

"Good. use your agressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you." - Emperor Palpatine

9. Agent Smith (The Matrix Trilogy)

Why I Like Him: Initially I resisted seeing the Matrix. I really don't like Keanu Reeves, and did not believe any movie could live up to the hype that surrounded the film. After I hadn't seen it for awhile the sequels came out and were renounced as pure crap for the most part. I was bored one night, though, and back when I was working for Pepsi and had waaay to much money on my hands I went to the mall and bought about 2 days worth of DVDs, 3 of which were the Matrix and its 2 sequels. (Mostly cause it was like 20 bucks for the lot of them) This is eerily similar to the way I got into Star Wars, cause I actually resisted seeing Star Wars for the longest time, and took all 3 home with me at once, and in the same way that I was blown away by a New Hope I was blown away by the Matrix and ended up watching all the other films that night. Maybe I'm using language that's too strong, but I really enjoyed the first film and thought that it was really well done. Now I'm starting to hinge on discussing the Matrix instead of Smith, so enough of that.
Smith is a relative newcomer to me compared to a lot of the villains on the list, and if I were to compile this list two years ago he wouldn't have been here. I should've known when everyone couldn't get past Hugo Weaving as Elrond ("Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson") that Smith was truly a memorable villain, but at the time I only knew him by the role he played in the Lord of the Rings movies. Now, after seeing the Matrix and V for Vendetta, I am a huge fan of his.
Smith is a sentient program, an Agent of the Matrix, whose sole purpose is to seek out and destroy any program or human avatar that would disturb the natural programming flow within the Matrix. Able to possess any user within the Matrix, as well as able to manipulate most of their surroundings, the Agents are terrors that seem to get less powerful as the series goes on. That's one major issue I have with the Matrix films, as they go on the agents, and the other agents of the machine world, which are played up as hugely deadly in the first film, are more easily taken on later on in the 2nd and 3rd movies. I keep getting off track though, this is about Smith.

Smith, eventually is partially overwritten by the One, gaining new powers and abilities similar in nature to a computer virus. He begins to systematically take over the entirety of the Matrix, assimilating everything in his path in an effort to eventually plunge the world into a void of nothingness. Diametrically opposed to Neo, the one, Smith has an attitude of merciless finality, believing that his winning is inevitable and that any attempts at resisting him are a futile waste of effort. Smith's end confuses me slightly even to this day, but I suppose the equation being balanced is as good an explanation as any.

"I’d like to share with you a revelation I’ve had, during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you aren’t actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with its surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply, and multiply until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You are a plague, and we... are the cure." - Agent Smith

"Do you hear that, Mr. Anderson? That is the sound of inevitability." - Agent Smith

Agent Smith: I killed you, Mr. Anderson. I watched you die.... with some satisfaction, I might add. Then something happened- something I thought would be impossible, but it happened anyway. You destroyed me, Mr. Anderson. Afterwards, I was aware of the rules. I knew what I was supposed to do, but I didn't. I was compelled to stay- compelled to disobey. And right now, here I stand because of you, Mr. Anderson. Because of you, I'm no longer an Agent of this system. Because of you, I'm unplugged. A new man, so to speak- like you. Apparently free. Neo: Congratulations. Agent Smith: Thank you.

(Throws cookies against wall.) "Maybe you knew I was going to do that, maybe you didn't. If you did, then that means you baked those cookies and set that plate there deliberately, purposefully — which means that you're sitting there also deliberately, purposefully." - Agent Smith

"Can you feel it Mr. Anderson? Closing in on you? Oh I can, I really should thank you after all. It was, after all, it was your life that taught me the purpose of all life. The purpose of life is to end." - Agent Smith

Agent Smith: Why, Mr. Anderson? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you're fighting for something? For more than your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Anderson. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Anderson. You must know it by now. You can't win. It's pointless to keep fighting. Why, Mr. Anderson? Why? Why do you persist? Neo: Because I choose to.

8. Captain James Hook (Peter Pan)

Smee: Good Mooooooooooooorning Neverland. Here he is, a man so deep, he's almost unfathomable. A man so quick, he's almost fast asleep. I give you, the steel handed stingray, Captain James Hook.

Why I Like Him: Killing at the slightest provocation, dashingly dressed in the latest fashion of his day, wielding a weapon that would forever characterize an entire genre of villains, Captain James Hook has been an idol of mine since I was a little kid. When I was 6 years old I loved him so much I dressed up as him for Halloween, and ever since then he's only grown on me. I was already a huge fan of the character, but when I saw the 1991 update of the story, Hook, I was completely sold on him.

Let's not kid ourselves, though, Hook is no braintrust. His schemes are not far reaching, his plans are not carefully thought out, and he isn't exactly a big "details" kind of guy. In fact, he falls for several ruses in both the books and the movies that call into question just how intelligent this guy really is...but he makes up for this lack of brain power with a dynamic charisma and boldness of character that makes him almost loveable. What makes him so great, though? His plans rarely succeed, he falls short of achieving even his simplest goals, and in the end he gets eaten by a crocodile. I may be reading too much into things, but I think it is because Hook is so human that makes him a truly great villain. He's a good swordsman, a decent leader, but at the end of the day he's a regular man attempting to accomplish his (evil) goals, and his tenacity in trying to take out his enemies and further his own cause really make him the great character he is. Maybe there is a little too much hero worship here, but I leave that up to you to decide.

"Oh, I hate being disappointed, Smee. And I hate living in this flawed body. And I hate living in Neverland. And I hate... I hate... I *hate* Peter Pan!" - Hook

Smee: I've just had an apostrophe. Hook: I think you mean an epiphany. Smee: No... lightning has just struck my brain. Hook: Well, that must hurt.

Hook: He taught her to fly. How? Wendy: You just think happy thoughts. They lift you into the air. Hook: Alas, I have no happy thoughts

Hook: Prepare to die Peter Pan! Peter Pan: To die would be a grand adventure! Hook: Death is the only adventure you have left!

7. Magneto (X-Men)

Why I Like Him: Most of the goofy storylines aside, Magneto is a very well developed, multi dimensional character with an agenda, and good reasons for it. Erik Magnus Lensherr, a jew in Nazi Germany, was shot and believed killed by German soldiers, summarily dumped in a mass grave and left for dead. He managed to survive...only to end up at Auschwitz. The rest of the details of his life I leave for most of you to read about, but after a number of harrowing ordeals he manifests his control over magnetism, and slowly begins to see what happened to the Jews in Germany happen again to his new "race". Determined not to allow such a tragedy to happen all over again he devotes himself to terrorism to protect himself and other mutants.

Even after softening late in to his career he still lapses into monstrosity time and time again, notably when he entombs the Red Skull (a Nazi war criminal) alive. Later still, when he finds that his mind may have been tampered with to bring about his new self he turns completely villainous again, this time with a renewed vengeance.

The plot lines of the movies I think did alot for the character of Magneto as well, because the face they put forth really was the aspect of him I like best. I look forward to a possible movie directly revolving around Magneto. I recently dug up this information about it:

Quote: A Magneto movie is in the works, and Ian McKellen recently revealed that both he and Patrick Stewart might appear in it, thanks to de-aging technology (the same technology used on the two actors in the opening of X-Men: The Last Stand). A small article from Entertainment Weekly has information on the movie:

"It's going to take place from 1939 Auschwitz up to 1955 or so," says writer Sheldon Turner of his just-announced "period" prequel to Fox's X-Men franchise. An exploration of villain Magneto's "psychological roots," Turner's script will also shed light on the youthful mutant's nemesis-then-friend Charles Xavier."

Sounds quite interesting, and I can hardly wait.

"Better to live on our feet than to die on our knees!" - Magneto

"Friends, our moment in history has arrived! We all have felt the sting of human hatred, seen the disgust smolder in their eyes. We have groveled and hidden, like beaten animals anxious for a crumb from a master! We have lived too long in darkness and fear! No more! Nature has made us superior! We are the living future of this mighty planet, this world is our world now, take it! It has begun!" - Magneto

"I don't want to do this Charles, rather I have to. I must be strong, because you and your X-Men are too weak to do that which must be done! ....For no matter what happens to you and me, the welfare of the children is paramount. Whether they be the innocent like Illyana, Doug and Anya before them, the lost such as my Acolytes, or the misguided like the fools you count among the X-Men; they need to be protected! They need to be awakened from the dream in which you've lulled them! Whether you admit it or not, they need...MAGNETO!" - Magneto

"I will bring you hope, old friend. And I ask only one thing in return: don't get in my way." - Magneto

6. Dr. Victor Von Doom (The Fantastic 4)

Why I Like Him: DOOM NEEDS NO EXPLANATION. Explanations are for beings that are clearly not as worthy as Doom...but because you are insignificant in the grand scheme of Doom's plans I suppose an education is in order.

Victor Von Doom was raised by gypsies in a small European county called Latveria. He lost both of his parents at a very young age. Swearing revenge, Victor began to increase both his scientific and mystical knowledge with such determination that he was given a full scholarship to Empire State University. It was at ESU that Victor met Reed Richards and Ben Grimm, and where he started his extra dimensional research. Doom's vanity prevented him from adjusting the schematics to one of his experiments, and the end result was an explosion that scarred Victor for life. Expelled from school, Victor began to travel the world, eventually stumbling upon a village of Tibetan monks who trained him and crafted him a suit of body armor, complete with face plate. He soon returned to Latveria, overthrew the government and crowned himself King. Ruling with an iron fist, Doom began to turn the resources of his small nation to his plans of world domination.

He has achieved two of his three major goals: world domination (although it hasn't been permanent yet), and the liberation of his mother's soul from the demon Mephisto's realm. Reed Richards has proven resourceful thus far, but it is only a matter of time before he is crushed by Doom! Doom has conquered nations, murdered hundreds (perhaps thousands), and managed to fight back even from death. Nothing can stop his machinations, in the end victory belongs to Doom.

"Pain? Pain is like love . . . like compassion! It is a thing only for lesser men. What is pain to Doom?" - Dr. Doom

"But time is endless...as is my hatred! When he least expects it, when he's most unprepared; Doom will strike again!!" - Dr. Doom

"The King of Latveria is no common murderer. If I cannot magnificently win a victory . . . it affords me no pleasure to merely slay a foe." - Dr. Doom

"A Renoir. I have three myself. I had four, but ordered one burned . . . It displeased me." - Dr. Doom

"So you would deign to know the secrets of Doom. Very well, it is good that you would read of the majesty and power of Doom; the rabble must always glean knowledge from their betters. Take care that you dare not to use the knowledge enclosed in these pages against our person. To do so would invoke the wrath of Doom, and such a thing should not be invited lightly. Learn well of Doom and his lands, for the world will soon fall before them." - Dr. Doom

5. The Dark Lord Sauron (Lord of the Rings)

Why I Like Him: When I started compiling names for a list like this a number of them I had to think about, and a number of them just came easily off the top of my head. Sauron, if you have not read the Silmarillion, may not be as clear a choice as many of you might think. In the Lord of the Rings you only ever hear of him, rarely (if ever) do you directly see Sauron taking a role in his manipulations. This is a credit to his power and planning, however, his evil extended ages back to the beginning of the First Age of Middle Earth when he was a servant to Morgoth, the Dark Lord Melkor.

Morgoth corrupted Sauron in the First Age, and made Sauron one of his chief lieutenants. During this time Sauron was known as Gorthaur the Cruel, a master of shape shifting and illusion. He ruled over vampires and werewolves, and was one of Morgoth's most powerful servants. He was defeated and diminished in the First Age, and his master Morgoth was banished by the Valar. Sauron hid in Middle Earth to escape judgement, only to make another move for power at the onset of the Second Age.

He reappeared at the opening of the Second Age, some 1,000 years after he hid himself from the world, under the guise of an illusion. Making himself appear to be beautiful, Sauron took the name Annatar "the Lord of Gifts" and went among the elves of Eregion. Counseling them in the ways of magic, he helped the elven-smiths forge the rings of power. Secretly, in the fires of Mount Doom, he had forged the One Ring that would have the power to dominate the wills of all the other ring bearers. The elves, who became aware of this, removed the rings and there was a great war fought between the forces of Sauron and the forces of elves. It was during this war that Sauron blazed deep into the heart of the elvenlands and took back 16 of the rings he helped to create. 3 rings were forged secretly without his aid, though, and remained with the elves.
Those 16 rings Sauron gave to the humans and dwarves. 7 he gave to the dwarves, who proved to willful to control, but were overwhelmed by greed instead. 9 he gave to the kings of men, whom became Nazgûl, enslaved to his will. He was driven back to Mordor where he raised the dark tower Barad-dûr, and gained control of many of the evil forces that he had controlled in the First Age. With an army of orcs, trolls, and evil men under his command he now was worshipped as the man god of Mordor.

It was at this point that Sauron and the Númenóreans began to wage war upon each other, and my knowledge of this period of time is a tad bit fuzzy, but suffice to say Sauron becomes an advisor to the human king of Númenor and convinces him to attack Valinor. The god Eru directly intervened, however, and drowned the Númenórean navy as they sailed to their destination. It was here that Sauron died for a time, however his spirit went back to Mordor and reassumed a corporeal form as he re-formed his army. It was here that he lost the ability to change into the forms he had decieved the elves with, however, and now he could only rule through terror and force.

This is about where most of you will begin to pick up the storyline of the Lord of the Rings, as a last alliance of elves and men was formed to stop him, invading Mordor and laying siege to Sauron's tower for 7 years. It was at this point Sauron was forced to emerge and was overwhelmed by Gil-galad and Elendil, whom were both killed in the process. Isildur, Elendil's son, took the ring for himself. You all should know the rest.

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky, Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die, One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them, One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. - The One Ring

"But they were, all of them, deceived, for another Ring was made. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged in secret a master Ring, to control all others. And into this Ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. "One Ring to rule them all." One by one, the Free Lands of Middle Earth fell to the power of the Ring. But there were some who resisted. A Last Alliance of Men and Elves marched against the armies of Mordor and on the slopes of Mount Doom, they fought for the freedom of Middle Earth. Victory was near. But the power of the Ring could not be undone." - Galadriel, retelling of the Last Alliance

4. Michael Corleone (The Godfather)

Why I Like Him: It is with a great reverance that I approach the last 5 choices on my countdown. These people may not have been as great, or as powerful, or as far reaching as some of the other choices on this list, but they undoubtably had an impact to make them forever significant. Michael Corleone, for any who have ever seen the Godfather, is without a question one of the most significant villains of all time, and a great example of a character that keeps people watching a film over and over again.

Many would argue that this man is a tragic hero, one who if circumstances were different would have led his family to become legitimate and upstanding. Would've, should've, could've, but he didn't. Michael Corleone, from the instant he put himself in the midst of the family business, was as cold blooded a bastard as Mr. Blonde, as calculating in his plans and schemes as Emperor Palpatine, and as merciless to foe and family member alike as John Herod. In fact, even though those are defining traits for most of those characters, Michael went one step beyond each of them in my opinion, because to act in the world he had to was far more treacherous territory then any of the others had to deal with.

To go on and on about Michael is unnecessary, as his place here nearly needs no explanation. The culmination of his plans in Part I and Part II of the Godfather speak volumes for his villainy, and to watch those plans in action is like watching a virtuoso at work. Few can compare to a villain of this caliber.

"I don't feel I have to wipe everybody out, Tom. Just my enemies." - Michael Corleone

"I know it was you Fredo. You broke my heart." - Michael Corleone

"If anything in this life is certain, if history has taught us anything, it is that you can kill anyone." - Michael Corleone

Senator Pat Geary: I despise the way you pose yourself. You and your whole fucking family. Michael Corleone: We're both part of the same hypocrisy, senator, but never think it applies to my family.

Don Corleone: I never wanted this for you. I work my whole life - I don't apologize - to take care of my family, and I refused to be a fool, dancing on the string held by all those bigshots. I don't apologize - that's my life - but I thought that, that when it was your time, that you would be the one to hold the string. Senator Corleone; Governor Corleone. Well, it wasn't enough time, Michael. It wasn't enough time. Michael Corleone: We'll get there, pop. We'll get there.

3. Darth Vader (The Star Wars Trilogy)

Why I Like Him: The face of evil, the true name that comes to mind whenever villain is thought of. Vader manages to encompass all that is villainous. His attire, his manner of speech, his deeds, his plans, everything about Vader oozes evil. There have been many attempts to copy him, many attempts at remaking him, but nothing compares with the man who steps onto the rebel ship at the beginning of A New Hope and instantly establishes himself as an extreme badass.
I'm not going to go on at length about Vader, because he is well known and the entirety of the Star Wars Saga pretty much places his background and life story out there. I will say this though: when I made this list, when I debated about laying out all those I idolized and looked up too, Vader was the first name to come to mind and I think he would be for almost anyone doing the same.

“Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force.” - Darth Vader

“I find your lack of faith disturbing.” - Darth Vader

Darth Vader: I've been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I met you I was but the learner. Now, *I* am the master. Obi-Wan: Only a master of evil, Darth.

'Impressive. Most impressive. Obi-Wan has taught you well. You have controlled your fear. Now, release your anger. Only your hatred can destroy me." - Darth Vader

2. Dr. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs)

Why I Like Him: The most brilliant on the countdown, and arguably the most evil, Hannibal Lecter is a monster the likes of which the world has truly never seen.

Lecter, while under psychological study for years while incarcerated, managed to demonstrate a variety of different symptoms of psychosis in an effort to confuse and confound the psychiatrists who attempted to analyze him. Even after all the movies and books it is still unclear to what extent Lecter is insane. When questioned by Clarice Starling his own synopsis of his condition is that he is evil, and he feels that psychiatry is wrong to categorize different kinds of evil as different behavioral conditions. He goes on to elaborate that the inconsistencies in his behavior are traits of pure evil, and that he does not possess a behavioral abnormality.

Lecter's MO is unique when compared to other fictional serial killers, because he is known to kill based on retribution, discourtesy and poetic justice along with necessity.

Most of Lecter's murders were carried out for revenge and retribution. This characteristic of his MO started early on, his first murder (Paul Momund) had insulted Lecter's aunt and Lecter then murdered him. The most relevant series of murders based on revenge was when he murdered all the members of the group of men that killed his sister Mischa. He is then seen neglectfully torturing Mason Verger for retribution of raping Margot Verger. He is then seen murdering Paul Krendler for disgracing Clarice Starling.

Lecter is most widely known to kill because of discourtesy and rudeness. This is first discovered in Silence of the Lambs when he drove Miggs to suicide after Miggs had thrown semen at Agent Starling as she walked by his cell. Lecter told Starling that discourtesy was "unspeakably ugly" to him. This is seen again in Hannibal when he kills Paul Krendler whom offends him.

However, Lecter's signature style is poetic justice, placing his victim's bodies in positions that imitate the positions of figures in historical documents, art, and medical books. His most referenced poetic justice style murder was with his sixth American victim, who was laced to a pegboard in the position of Wound Man. The next person we see this with is Pazzi during Hannibal, Lecter hanged him at the same location and in the same manner as Pazzi's ancestor. Lecter then mutilates Paul Krendler by performing a cranionomy on him, a medical tradition of the ancient Egyptians. When he kills the bow hunter, he places him in a position of an ancient Norse execution method, the Blood Eagle.

A true artist when it comes to killing, Lecter's style and charm have made him an icon that many have tried to duplicate, in real life and in fiction, and none could ever rival. Well, almost none...
Murray: Is it true what they're sayin', he's some kinda vampire? Clarice Starling: They don't have a name for what he is.

"You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Good nutrition's given you some length of bone, but you're not more than one generation from poor white trash, are you, Agent Starling? And that accent you've tried so desperately to shed: pure West Virginia. What is your father, dear? Is he a coal miner? Does he stink of the lamp? You know how quickly the boys found you... all those tedious sticky fumblings in the back seats of cars... while you could only dream of getting out... getting anywhere... getting all the way to the F-B-I." - Dr. Hannibal Lecter

"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti." - Dr. Hannibal Lecter

"I do wish we could chat longer, but... I'm having an old friend for dinner." - Dr. Hannibal Lecter

Hannibal Lecter: Amputate a man's leg and he can still feel it tickling. Tell me, mum, when your little girl is on the slab, where will it tickle you? Senator Ruth Martin: Take this... *thing* back to Baltimore! Hannibal Lecter: Five foot ten, strongly built, about a hundred and eighty pounds; hair blonde, eyes pale blue. He'd be about thirty-five now. He said he lived in Philadelphia, but he may have lied. That's all I can remember, mum, but if I think of any more, I will let you know. Oh, and Senator, just one more thing: love your suit!

Hannibal Lecter: Would you ever say to me "Stop. If you love me, stop?" Clarice Starling: Not in a thousand years. Hannibal Lecter: "Not in a thousand years"... That's my girl.

"Dear Clarice,
I have followed with enthusiasm the course of your disgrace and public shaming. My own never bothered me except for the inconvenience of being incarcerated, but you may lack perspective. In our discussions down in the dungeon it was apparent to me that your father, the dead night watchman, figures largely in your value system. I think your success in putting an end to Jame Gumb's career as a couturier pleased you most because you could imagine your father being pleased. But now, alas, you're in bad odour with the FBI. Do you imagine your daddy being shamed by your disgrace? Do you see him in his plain pine box crushed by your failure; a sorry, petty end of a promising career? What is worst about this humiliation Clarice? Is it how your failure will reflect on your mommy and daddy? Is your worst fear that people will now and forever believe they were indeed just good old trailer camp tornado bait white trash and that perhaps you are too? By the way I couldn't help noticing on the FBI's rather dull public website that I have been hoisted from the Bureau's archives of the common criminal and elevated to the more prestigious 10 Most Wanted list. Is this coincidence, or are you back on the case? If so, goody goody, cause I need to come out of retirement and return to public life. I imagine you sitting in a dark basement room bent over papers and computer screens. Is that accurate? Please tell me truly, Special Agent Starling.
Regards, Your old pal Hannibal Lecter, M.D.

1. The Joker (DC Comics)

Why I Like Him: The Clown Prince of Crime, the Harlequin of Hate, and the Ace of Knaves, the Joker is a media giant, his reach nearly extending across every country and continent in the world. For the past 70 years or so he has been the arch rival to one of the most heralded super heroes of all time, and he has done so without super powers. He has crippled heroes (Barbara Gordon -Batgirl/Oracle), killed heroes (Jason Todd - Robin II), sparred with the greats (Wonder Woman, Superman, the Flash) and keeps coming again and again and again. Few villains have ever experienced the longevity, notoriety, and popularity of the Joker, and since he seems to still be running strong after all these years few probably ever will.

The Joker is said to have many different origin stories, and I believe I've read all of them. In "The Killing Joke" (which is a must read for Joker fans) he even comments on his multiple origin stories, saying that if he has to have a past he'd prefer it to be multiple choice. He was strong armed by some gangsters to help them raid a chemical warehouse he used to work in. They dressed him up as the supervillain the Red Hood, and when Batman arrived on the scene a fight ensued that ended up with the Joker getting dropped in a vat of chemicals. The most recent addition to the storyline was that the gangsters had the wife of the Joker killed to make sure he wouldn't wuss out of the operation, and after the identity of her killer was revealed to the Joker by the Riddler, he began a hunt to find the man who murdered his wife.

The Joker's unpredictability is his greatest strength, the one thing that has kept him on par with all others in the DC universe. Lex Luthor, Superman, the Green Lantern, no one can predict the Joker's next move and as a result at one point or another all have been laid low by him or one of his plans. Even if you're an ally of the Joker you're hardly safe, which makes him undoubtedly, in my opinion, the greatest villain of all time.

"Haven't you ever heard of the healing power of laughter?" - The Joker

Vicki Vale: You're insane!
Joker: I thought I was a Pisces!

"I'm only laughing on the outsideMy smile is just skin deepIf you could see inside I'm really cryingYou might join me for a weep."- The Joker

"You can't kill me without becoming like me. I can't kill you without losing the only human being who can keep up with me. Isn't it ironic?!" - The Joker

"I could never kill you. Where would the act be without my straight man?" - The Joker

"Notice the hideously bloated sense of humanity's importance. The club-footed social conscience and the withered optimism. It's certainly not for the squeamish is it? Most repulsive of all are its frail and useless notions of order and sanity. If too much weight is placed upon them... they snap... faced with the inescapable fact that human existence is mad, random, and pointless, one in eight of them crack up and go stark slavering buggo! Who can blame them? In a world as psychotic as this... any other response would be crazy!" - The Joker

"All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day. You had a bad day once. Am I right? You had a bad day and everything changed" - The Joker

"It's all a joke! Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for... it's all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?" - The Joker

(Honorable Mention) George W. Bush Why: I think we all can come up with something.

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